Mom guilt can be crippling and dangerous to a mother’s well-being. Not many of us know how to deal with mom guilt. And what is mom guilt anyway. The truth is that only a healthy mom can fully be present for her child.
This article will outline the three easy steps you can take to cope with your mom guilt. And you will learn how to start taking care of yourself so you can be an even better mom!
I assume you are here to be a better mom. You’re probably exhausted and running out of steam and time to do what you cherish the most- spending quality time with your little ones. So let’s get started with how you can change that.
Step One: Identify the Guilt
You can take the time for your self-care as well as serve others. Step one is to identify the worry that is making you feel guilty in the first place. Be specific here, do not just state a general worry or statement of self-doubt such as “I’m not a good mom.” What specific action you’re doing makes you feel this way?
You need to ask some tough questions, like are my kids spending too much time with a sitter? Should I be feeding organic things to my kids? Is cereal a bad morning breakfast? Be real with yourself for these questions or any other ones that pop into your head. This will help you implement the next two steps easier.
Next, make your worries into an actionable format so you can take action instead of worrying about them. The next two steps involve doing the action. For step one, allow yourself to do a bit more reflection.
Step Two: Reflect
The second step is the hardest because it is the reflection step. Worrying does not solve problems, so it’s important to trust your intuition here. That is why we took care of all the worry in the first step.
Once you have the answer to the first step, you can implement it when ready. Take some time for a gut test right now. It’s important to pass the gut check during this moment. You know yourself and your situation best. This means you’re the only one who can make the right decision for you.
What feels best right now? You can always change it later. During this step, you need to pay attention to your intuition. What is right for you and your family? Be confident in yourself and your motherhood.
Step Three: Schedule Your Time
The third step is to schedule some time into your calendar to spend with your kids. Like any other important dates and meetings, you must have that non-negotiable time for your kids. We all have busy lives and must schedule the things that matter most to us.
Scheduling time for your kids will allow you to pay attention and portion your time for yourself and your family. This will help you eliminate the guilt you are dreading. Plan for some quality time with your kids!
You may also enroll them in something you both would be interested in, like yoga. My daughter and I did ice skating lessons together! She had a blast, and it was some good quality time we both enjoyed.
Lastly, you could follow up with your kids. This can be around when things are tough, so they feel safe and wanted. Additionally, this will help them grow their self-esteem.
The big question you should ask is if you can afford this investment. Can you financially afford it? Do you have the time to implement it? What barriers are in your way? And so on.
Whatever the version of that question is for you, you’ll have to decide. But it’s important to take the time to ask and be specific about it. Be honest and upfront with yourself. We don’t take the time to sit, reflect, and face the real reasons.
Also, time goes by fast, and we need to make it work. Just like you schedule the time for your kids, do not forget to schedule the time for yourself as well. Be easy on yourself and pay attention to how you can better care for yourself so you can show up 100% for your kids. To check out this topic more in-depth, check out my video here.