Money makes you happy – is a myth. In my initial paperwork for counseling and coaching new clients, almost 80% of the people list the following as one of their goals: “I just want to be happy.” I then help them define happiness, break it down what it looks like for them, what it feels like for them, because it is very subjective and different for every person. In this episode, you will learn how to define your own happiness so you can work towards achieving it. Let’s dive into it, shall we?
Did you know that about 80% of people set “I just want to be happy” as one of their goals when they start working with me? From there, we work together to break happiness down and what it looks like for them. This is because it’s subjective and looks different for everyone. You can learn how to define your happiness and work towards achieving it.
A Gallup study shows that 1 in 7 people reported not being happy. Another study showed that at any particular time, richer individuals are happier than poorer ones. Yet, over time society did not become happier as it became richer.
The bottom line is that money-making you happy is a myth.
What Does the Research Say?
From my practice, 70% of my clients don’t seek coaching or counseling because they don’t have enough money. Additionally, 80% of my clients said being happy is one of their main goals. This varies in different cultures, religions, countries, and so on. The bottom line is happiness is subjective.
Research says happiness consists of positive emotions such as joy, contentment, compassion, and gratitude. This data supports the correlation between health and happiness. Therefore, being happy is imperative to your overall physical and emotional health.
How Can You Tell If You’re Not Happy?
How can you tell if you’re not happy? Well, you are grateful, open-minded, and enjoying life when you are happy. You smile, laugh with others, and practice patience. When you are happy, you take care of yourself, build happy relationships, and can easily cope with all the stress and negative emotions life may throw at you. Simply, if you’re struggling, you probably are not happy.
You may be asking yourself, what can I do to make myself happier? It’s an internal job, and you can only change your happiness. You have control over your own emotions.
I often hear that happiness is not a choice. But I argue you do have a choice. You choose to look at life from a particular perspective. If you keep waiting for circumstances or situations to change, you will be unhappy forever.
You must come to terms with working on yourself and start changing within yourself. This means changing yourself. You need to change the narrative of the story you’re telling yourself and how you see the world. You can adjust the lens you look at the world from, and this adjustment comes from within you.
You don’t have to wait for the negative circumstances or situations or the other people to be out of your life so you can be happy. You can do that today! In fact, you can do it right now. Your awareness helps you raise your happiness levels. The idea behind this is the things that make us happy, and we are more likely to choose those things to do or have so we are happier.
Define What Happiness Means To You
Happiness is about how much you enjoy what you have, not how much you have accumulated. And you can be happy with whatever amount you have right now, or you won’t be happy with any amount you gain. So be happy right now, in this moment.
When she starts working with clients and their goals, the first thing to do is to have them define their version of happiness. I have a worksheet that will help you define what happiness is to you so you can start actively working on it.
Step 1: Take a deeper breath and ask this question to yourself when you’re relaxed – what will you need to have, do, or be to be happier in life. Be specific and take your time here.
Step 2: How would you measure your happiness at the next level? Don’t just say money – research doesn’t support this. Look for the things that make you happy, then identify more of those things. Get in touch with your emotions to see what expensive item made you happy. Or was it the confidence it made you feel? Try to define emotions and feelings because happiness is an emotion, and emotions don’t need money.
I am trying to help you identify that you can be happy right now – it doesn’t take much. Happiness is a state of mind to practice, just like coping with anger, frustration, or agitation. You choose to focus on things that make you happy. It’s a choice.
You can be a victim all you want, but at some point, you will have to take things or matters into your own hands. Be deliberate about what you want for your happiness and what you want to be happy about?
To learn more about this topic, check out my in-depth video below.